This question comes from Emily in Los Angeles.  She writes,

QUESTION: Last weekend I went clubbing with two of my girlfriends in Vegas.  Around 2am my friends got tired and went up to the room.  The music was bumpin’, so I decided to stay and get my groove on. About 15 minutes later, I was approached by this beautiful man. We had a great time dancing and enjoying each others’ company.  As we left the dance floor and headed to the bar, his friend caught up with him and whispered in his ear (loud enough for me to overhear), “is she a prostitute?” I was shocked, and a little offended.

Why is it cool for a man to be at a club by himself , but when a woman is at a club by herself she is perceived to be a prostitute? And, is there something that I should do in the future to turn-down my personality so I don’t come-off like a prostitute? 

TREY SAY: Ladies, pay close attention to what I’m about to say. 

It’s never cool to be in a club by yourself.  Ever.  Under any circumstances. 

If you’re out clubbing and your girlfriends want to go to bed for the evening, then you have to go home with them.  Period.  Why?  Because we (men) get freaked out by women that are out by themselves, due to the fact that we just assume that you’re crazy or that you’ve got a Level 3 version of syphilis or something.  Seriously, it’s just not natural, and let’s be honest with ourselves – the only women that go to clubs alone are prostitutes and skanky cougars.

And where the hell did you get the idea that it’s cool for a dude to go out to a club by himself?  It’s about as “cool” as a chick with hairy forearms.  When was the last time one of you ladies went out to a club and saw a man by himself and thought, “Wow, that creepy guy hanging out by himself is really hot…I’d love him to bang me out African-style!  I hope he comes over to talk to me!”  It just doesn’t happen. 

Since I’m here to help you out, let me give you a brief list of things that you should never do alone:

1. Watch the Superbowl (or any other big-time sporting event):  These events are meant to be watched with friends.  So if you’re watching them alone, it means that you have no friends and are a loser.  If this describes you, please kill yourself after you are finished reading this column.

 

2. Dinner at restaurant:  I know what you’re thinking.  Some of you travel on business and have to eat out at restaurants.  I get it, but it’s still not cool and is very creepy.  Just order room service.

 

3. Going to the movies:  Yes, I’m sure a lot of you have done it before – but now that I’m telling you that you’re a loser if you do it, I bet you won’t do it again.  Who cares if you can’t talk in the movie theater?  You should still be there with your girlfriend or boyfriend.  I’m just sayin’…

Unless you want dudes to ask what your “rate” is, I’d highly recommend that you don’t hang out at the clubs by yourself.  It’s weird, and men don’t like it.  Let me know how not acting like a prostitute works out for you.